In Urdu, "you" is not a single word but a social decision. Three pronouns cover the English "you": آپ (āp) is the formal, respectful form used with elders, strangers, teachers, and anyone in authority — it is the form every learner should default to until socially confident. تم (tum) is the informal form for friends, peers, and younger family members. تو (tū) is the intimate or very colloquial form used between close friends or with children; it can sound rude if misjudged and is not taught actively in this lesson. The choice of pronoun is grammatically consequential: each triggers different verb endings, making register inseparable from grammar in Urdu.
Key Takeaways
- آپ (āp) = formal/respectful "you" — always safe for learners - تم (tum) = informal "you" — peers, friends, younger relatives - تو (tū) = intimate "you" — avoid until socially confident - Each pronoun takes a different verb ending: آپ → ہیں (haiṅ), تم → ہو (ho), تو → ہے (hai) - آپ is grammatically plural even when addressing one person
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Note: Urdu is written right to left. Line a gives Urdu script with gloss; line b gives romanisation with gloss. A blank line separates each example.
9.1a آپ you-FORMAL کیسے how ہیں are-pl 9.1b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kaisay (KAY-say) how haiṅ (hain) are-pl
9.2a آپ you-FORMAL کہاں where سے from ہیں are 9.2b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kahāṅ (kah-AAN) where se (say) from haiṅ (hain) are
9.3a آپ you-FORMAL کا POSS نام name کیا what ہے is 9.3b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kā (kaa) POSS nām (naam) name kyā (kyaa) what hai (hay) is
9.4a آپ you-FORMAL یہ this کتاب book پڑھتے read-FORMAL ہیں are 9.4b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL yeh (yay) this kitāb (ki-TAAB) book paṛhte (PARRH-tay) read-FORMAL haiṅ (hain) are
9.5a آپ you-FORMAL سے from مل meet کر having خوشی happiness ہوئی happened 9.5b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL se (say) from mil (mil) meet kar (kar) having khushī (khu-SHEE) happiness huī (hoo-EE) happened
9.6a آپ you-FORMAL کیا what کام work کرتے do-FORMAL ہیں are 9.6b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kyā (kyaa) what kām (kaam) work karte (KAR-tay) do-FORMAL haiṅ (hain) are
9.7a کیا Q-MARKER آپ you-FORMAL اردو Urdu بولتے speak-FORMAL ہیں are 9.7b kyā (kyaa) Q-MARKER āp (ahp) you-FORMAL urdū (ur-DOO) Urdu bolte (BOL-tay) speak-FORMAL haiṅ (hain) are
9.8a آپ you-FORMAL کل yesterday کہاں where تھے were-FORMAL 9.8b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kal (kul) yesterday kahāṅ (kah-AAN) where the (thay) were-FORMAL
9.9a تم you-INFORMAL کہاں where جا go رہے PROG ہو are-INFORMAL 9.9b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL kahāṅ (kah-AAN) where jā (jaa) go rahe (RAH-hay) PROG ho (ho) are-INFORMAL
9.10a تم you-INFORMAL نے ERG کھانا food کھایا ate کیا Q-MARKER 9.10b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL ne (nay) ERG khānā (KHAA-naa) food khāyā (KHAA-yaa) ate kyā (kyaa) Q-MARKER
9.11a تم you-INFORMAL میرے my دوست friend ہو are-INFORMAL 9.11b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL mere (MAY-ray) my dost (dost) friend ho (ho) are-INFORMAL
9.12a تم you-INFORMAL کیوں why نہیں not آئے came 9.12b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL kyoṅ (kyon) why nahīṅ (na-HEEN) not āye (AA-yay) came
9.13a آپ you-FORMAL کو DAT چائے tea چاہیے is-needed 9.13b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL ko (ko) DAT chāy (chaay) tea chāhiye (CHAA-hee-yay) is-needed
9.14a آپ you-FORMAL نے ERG بہت very اچھا good کام work کیا did 9.14b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL ne (nay) ERG bahut (ba-HUT) very achhā (ach-CHAA) good kām (kaam) work kiyā (ki-YAA) did
9.15a تم you-INFORMAL سے from بات talk کرنی do-INF ہے is مجھے to-me 9.15b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL se (say) from bāt (baat) talk karnī (KAR-nee) do-INF hai (hay) is mujhe (mu-JHE) to-me
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9.1 آپ کیسے ہیں؟ Āp kaisay haiṅ? "How are you?" (formal)
9.2 آپ کہاں سے ہیں؟ Āp kahāṅ se haiṅ? "Where are you from?" (formal)
9.3 آپ کا نام کیا ہے؟ Āp kā nām kyā hai? "What is your name?" (formal)
9.4 آپ یہ کتاب پڑھتے ہیں۔ Āp yeh kitāb paṛhte haiṅ. "You are reading this book." (formal)
9.5 آپ سے مل کر خوشی ہوئی۔ Āp se mil kar khushī huī. "It was a pleasure to meet you." (formal)
9.6 آپ کیا کام کرتے ہیں؟ Āp kyā kām karte haiṅ? "What work do you do?" (formal)
9.7 کیا آپ اردو بولتے ہیں؟ Kyā āp urdū bolte haiṅ? "Do you speak Urdu?" (formal)
9.8 آپ کل کہاں تھے؟ Āp kal kahāṅ the? "Where were you yesterday?" (formal)
9.9 تم کہاں جا رہے ہو؟ Tum kahāṅ jā rahe ho? "Where are you going?" (informal)
9.10 تم نے کھانا کھایا کیا؟ Tum ne khānā khāyā kyā? "Did you eat?" (informal)
9.11 تم میرے دوست ہو۔ Tum mere dost ho. "You are my friend." (informal)
9.12 تم کیوں نہیں آئے؟ Tum kyoṅ nahīṅ āye? "Why didn't you come?" (informal)
9.13 آپ کو چائے چاہیے؟ Āp ko chāy chāhiye? "Would you like tea?" (formal)
9.14 آپ نے بہت اچھا کام کیا۔ Āp ne bahut achhā kām kiyā. "You did very good work." (formal)
9.15 تم سے بات کرنی ہے مجھے۔ Tum se bāt karnī hai mujhe. "I need to talk to you." (informal)
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9.1 آپ کیسے ہیں؟
9.2 آپ کہاں سے ہیں؟
9.3 آپ کا نام کیا ہے؟
9.4 آپ یہ کتاب پڑھتے ہیں۔
9.5 آپ سے مل کر خوشی ہوئی۔
9.6 آپ کیا کام کرتے ہیں؟
9.7 کیا آپ اردو بولتے ہیں؟
9.8 آپ کل کہاں تھے؟
9.9 تم کہاں جا رہے ہو؟
9.10 تم نے کھانا کھایا کیا؟
9.11 تم میرے دوست ہو۔
9.12 تم کیوں نہیں آئے؟
9.13 آپ کو چائے چاہیے؟
9.14 آپ نے بہت اچھا کام کیا۔
9.15 تم سے بات کرنی ہے مجھے۔
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These are the grammar rules for آپ and تم.
The three "you" pronouns
Urdu distinguishes three levels of address for the second person:
- تو (tū) — very intimate or condescending; grammatically third-person singular; pairs with ہے (hai) - تم (tum) — informal; grammatically second-person plural; pairs with ہو (ho) - آپ (āp) — formal/respectful; grammatically third-person plural; pairs with ہیں (haiṅ)
A learner should use آپ by default. تم is appropriate once a relationship is established as informal. تو should be avoided.
Verb agreement
The verb ending changes to match the pronoun:
- آپ کرتے ہیں (āp karte haiṅ) — you do (formal) - تم کرتے ہو (tum karte ho) — you do (informal) - تو کرتا ہے (tū kartā hai) — you do (intimate/masculine)
Note that آپ uses the same verb form as "they" (وہ ہیں), which is why it is called "grammatically third-person plural." This is not an error — it is the standard honorific construction.
The ergative postposition نے (ne)
In past tenses with transitive verbs, the subject takes نے (ne) after it. This applies to تم and آپ:
- تم نے کھایا (tum ne khāyā) — you ate (informal) - آپ نے کیا (āp ne kiyā) — you did (formal)
Possessives
Possessive forms differ per pronoun:
- آپ کا / آپ کی / آپ کے (āp kā / kī / ke) — your (formal, varies by gender of noun) - تمہارا / تمہاری / تمہارے (tumhārā / tumhārī / tumhāre) — your (informal)
Common Mistakes
Using تم with someone who expects آپ is the most significant social error a learner can make. When in doubt, always use آپ. Mixing verb endings (e.g. آپ کرتے ہو instead of آپ کرتے ہیں) is a grammatical error that native speakers notice immediately.
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The choice between آپ and تم in Urdu is never merely grammatical — it is a social act. Using آپ signals respect, distance, and formality; using تم signals closeness, equality, or superiority. In Pakistani and North Indian Urdu-speaking culture, the default for any new acquaintance, anyone older, any professional context, or any formal setting is always آپ. To use تم with someone who considers themselves your senior is a serious faux pas.
In poetry and classical literature, تو (tū) is frequently used as the address to God — the most intimate of all relationships — and to the beloved in ghazal poetry. This gives تو a complex cultural resonance: simultaneously the most intimate and potentially the most disrespectful form, depending entirely on context.
In contemporary Pakistani urban speech, particularly among younger speakers, the boundaries are shifting: تم is increasingly used among peers of similar age and social standing, and even آپ is sometimes used with تم-form verbs (آپ کرتے ہو rather than آپ کرتے ہیں) in informal registers. Learners should be aware of this variation but default to the standard formal construction.
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From Mirza Ghalib (1797–1869), one of the supreme poets of the Urdu tradition:
ہم کو فریاد کرنی آتی ہے آپ سنتے نہیں تو کیا کیجئے
Hum ko faryād karnī ātī hai Āp sunte nahīṅ to kyā kījiye
F-A: Intralinear Analysis
Line 1: ہم we کو DAT فریاد lament کرنی do-INF آتی comes ہے is
hum (hum) we ko (ko) DAT faryād (far-YAAD) lament karnī (KAR-nee) do-INF ātī (AA-tee) comes hai (hay) is
Line 2: آپ you-FORMAL سنتے listen-FORMAL نہیں not تو then کیا what کیجئے is-to-be-done
āp (ahp) you-FORMAL sunte (SUN-tay) listen-FORMAL nahīṅ (na-HEEN) not to (to) then kyā (kyaa) what kījiye (KEE-jee-yay) is-to-be-done
F-B: Natural Text with Translation
ہم کو فریاد کرنی آتی ہے / آپ سنتے نہیں تو کیا کیجئے
"I know how to lament — but you do not listen, so what is one to do?"
F-C: Original Script
ہم کو فریاد کرنی آتی ہے آپ سنتے نہیں تو کیا کیجئے
F-D: Grammar and Vocabulary Notes
فریاد (faryād) — lamentation, complaint, cry for justice; a key word in classical Urdu poetry, carrying connotations of the beloved's indifference and the lover's helplessness.
آپ سنتے نہیں — "you do not listen" — formal second person with the present habitual tense. سنتے ہیں becomes سنتے نہیں in the negative (ہیں drops in colloquial negatives).
کیجئے (kījiye) — the formal imperative/subjunctive of کرنا (karnā, to do), used here in the rhetorical sense "what is to be done?" This is the highly polite imperative form built on آپ.
The couplet is from Ghalib's Divan and perfectly illustrates the social weight of آپ: even in an address of complaint to an indifferent beloved, the formal pronoun is maintained, giving the poem a quality of dignified suffering rather than reproach.
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A student (طالب علم, tālib-e-ilm) meets a new professor (استاد, ustād) at university, then later encounters a childhood friend (دوست, dost). The shift from آپ to تم mirrors the shift in relationship.
Part A — Intralinear Construed Text
9.16a استاد professor صاحب sir آپ you-FORMAL کا POSS نام name کیا what ہے is 9.16b ustād (us-TAAD) professor ṣāhib (SAA-hib) sir āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kā (kaa) POSS nām (naam) name kyā (kyaa) what hai (hay) is
9.17a میرا my نام name احمد Ahmad ہے is آپ you-FORMAL کون who ہیں are 9.17b merā (MAY-raa) my nām (naam) name Aḥmad (AH-mad) Ahmad hai (hay) is āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kaun (kawn) who haiṅ (hain) are
9.18a آپ you-FORMAL کا POSS مضمون subject کیا what ہے is 9.18b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL kā (kaa) POSS maẓmūn (maz-MOON) subject kyā (kyaa) what hai (hay) is
9.19a میں I اردو Urdu ادب literature پڑھتا study-MASC ہوں am 9.19b maiṅ (main) I urdū (ur-DOO) Urdu adab (a-DAB) literature paṛhtā (PARRH-taa) study-MASC hūṅ (hoon) am
9.20a آپ you-FORMAL نے ERG اچھا good مضمون subject چنا chose ہے is-PERF 9.20b āp (ahp) you-FORMAL ne (nay) ERG achhā (ach-CHAA) good maẓmūn (maz-MOON) subject chunā (chu-NAA) chose hai (hay) is-PERF
9.21a کیا Q-MARKER آپ you-FORMAL غالب Ghalib کو ACC جانتے know-FORMAL ہیں are 9.21b kyā (kyaa) Q-MARKER āp (ahp) you-FORMAL Ghālib (GHAA-lib) Ghalib ko (ko) ACC jānte (JAAN-tay) know-FORMAL haiṅ (hain) are
9.22a جی yes-respectful آپ you-FORMAL کے POSS-pl ساتھ with پڑھنا study-INF چاہتا want-MASC ہوں am 9.22b jī (jee) yes-respectful āp (ahp) you-FORMAL ke (kay) POSS-pl sāth (saath) with paṛhnā (PARRH-naa) study-INF chāhtā (CHAA-htaa) want-MASC hūṅ (hoon) am
9.23a ارے hey تم you-INFORMAL یہاں here کیسے how آئے came 9.23b are (a-RAY) hey tum (tum) you-INFORMAL yahāṅ (ya-HAAN) here kaise (KAY-say) how āye (AA-yay) came
9.24a تم you-INFORMAL نے ERG بتایا told نہیں not کہ that یہاں here پڑھتے study ہو are-INF 9.24b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL ne (nay) ERG batāyā (ba-TAA-yaa) told nahīṅ (na-HEEN) not ke (kay) that yahāṅ (ya-HAAN) here paṛhte (PARRH-tay) study ho (ho) are-INF
9.25a تم you-INFORMAL بھی also اردو Urdu پڑھ study رہے PROG ہو are-INF 9.25b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL bhī (bhee) also urdū (ur-DOO) Urdu paṛh (parrh) study rahe (RAH-hay) PROG ho (ho) are-INF
9.26a ہاں yes تم you-INFORMAL کو DAT یاد memory ہے is ہم we نے ERG ساتھ together پڑھا studied تھا had 9.26b hāṅ (haan) yes tum (tum) you-INFORMAL ko (ko) DAT yād (yaad) memory hai (hay) is ham (hum) we ne (nay) ERG sāth (saath) together paṛhā (PARRH-aa) studied thā (thaa) had
9.27a تم you-INFORMAL کب when سے from یہاں here ہو are-INF 9.27b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL kab (kub) when se (say) from yahāṅ (ya-HAAN) here ho (ho) are-INF
9.28a میں I اس this سال year آیا came ہوں am-PERF 9.28b maiṅ (main) I is (is) this sāl (saal) year āyā (AA-yaa) came hūṅ (hoon) am-PERF
9.29a تم you-INFORMAL سے from مل meet کر having بہت very خوشی happiness ہوئی happened 9.29b tum (tum) you-INFORMAL se (say) from mil (mil) meet kar (kar) having bahut (ba-HUT) very khushī (khu-SHEE) happiness huī (hoo-EE) happened
9.30a چلو come-INF کل tomorrow ساتھ together چائے tea پیتے drink-PROG ہیں are 9.30b chalo (cha-LO) come-INF kal (kul) tomorrow sāth (saath) together chāy (chaay) tea pīte (PEE-tay) drink-PROG haiṅ (hain) are
Part B — Natural Sentences
9.16 استاد صاحب، آپ کا نام کیا ہے؟ Ustād ṣāhib, āp kā nām kyā hai? "Sir, what is your name?"
9.17 میرا نام احمد ہے — آپ کون ہیں؟ Merā nām Aḥmad hai — āp kaun haiṅ? "My name is Ahmad — who are you?"
9.18 آپ کا مضمون کیا ہے؟ Āp kā maẓmūn kyā hai? "What is your subject?"
9.19 میں اردو ادب پڑھتا ہوں۔ Maiṅ urdū adab paṛhtā hūṅ. "I study Urdu literature."
9.20 آپ نے اچھا مضمون چنا ہے۔ Āp ne achhā maẓmūn chunā hai. "You have chosen a good subject."
9.21 کیا آپ غالب کو جانتے ہیں؟ Kyā āp Ghālib ko jānte haiṅ? "Do you know Ghalib?"
9.22 جی، آپ کے ساتھ پڑھنا چاہتا ہوں۔ Jī, āp ke sāth paṛhnā chāhtā hūṅ. "Yes, I would like to study with you."
9.23 ارے، تم یہاں کیسے آئے؟ Are, tum yahāṅ kaise āye? "Hey, how did you end up here?"
9.24 تم نے بتایا نہیں کہ یہاں پڑھتے ہو! Tum ne batāyā nahīṅ ke yahāṅ paṛhte ho! "You didn't tell me you were studying here!"
9.25 تم بھی اردو پڑھ رہے ہو؟ Tum bhī urdū paṛh rahe ho? "You're studying Urdu too?"
9.26 ہاں — تمہیں یاد ہے، ہم نے ساتھ پڑھا تھا؟ Hāṅ — tumhẽ yād hai, ham ne sāth paṛhā thā? "Yes — do you remember, we studied together?"
9.27 تم کب سے یہاں ہو؟ Tum kab se yahāṅ ho? "How long have you been here?"
9.28 میں اس سال آیا ہوں۔ Maiṅ is sāl āyā hūṅ. "I arrived this year."
9.29 تم سے مل کر بہت خوشی ہوئی۔ Tum se mil kar bahut khushī huī. "It was so good to run into you."
9.30 چلو، کل ساتھ چائے پیتے ہیں۔ Chalo, kal sāth chāy pīte haiṅ. "Come on, let's have tea together tomorrow."
Part C — Target Language Only
9.16 استاد صاحب، آپ کا نام کیا ہے؟ 9.17 میرا نام احمد ہے — آپ کون ہیں؟ 9.18 آپ کا مضمون کیا ہے؟ 9.19 میں اردو ادب پڑھتا ہوں۔ 9.20 آپ نے اچھا مضمون چنا ہے۔ 9.21 کیا آپ غالب کو جانتے ہیں؟ 9.22 جی، آپ کے ساتھ پڑھنا چاہتا ہوں۔ 9.23 ارے، تم یہاں کیسے آئے؟ 9.24 تم نے بتایا نہیں کہ یہاں پڑھتے ہو! 9.25 تم بھی اردو پڑھ رہے ہو؟ 9.26 ہاں — تمہیں یاد ہے، ہم نے ساتھ پڑھا تھا؟ 9.27 تم کب سے یہاں ہو؟ 9.28 میں اس سال آیا ہوں۔ 9.29 تم سے مل کر بہت خوشی ہوئی۔ 9.30 چلو، کل ساتھ چائے پیتے ہیں۔
Part D — Grammar Notes for Dialogue
The dialogue deliberately moves from آپ (formal, student to professor) to تم (informal, old friends reunited). This switch at example 9.23 — marked by the colloquial exclamation ارے (are, "hey!") — illustrates precisely how register works in Urdu: the pronoun does not merely follow the relationship but actively signals it.
تمہیں (tumhẽ) in 9.26 is the dative form of تم: "to you (informal)." Compare آپ کو (āp ko) for the formal equivalent. These contracted dative forms are common in spoken Urdu.
چلو (chalo) in 9.30 is the informal imperative of چلنا (chalnā, to walk/go), used colloquially as "come on" or "let's go." It naturally accompanies تم-register speech.
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آپ (āp): the ā is long, as in "father"; the p is unaspirated. Rhymes with "carp" without the r.
تم (tum): short u as in "put"; m fully nasalised. Rhymes with "room" in some dialects, closer to "tum" in standard usage.
ہیں (haiṅ): the ṅ indicates nasalisation of the preceding vowel; do not pronounce a hard n. Sounds like "hain" with a nasal quality.
ہو (ho): short o, as in "go" but clipped.
کیسے (kaise): two syllables — KAY-say. The k is unaspirated.
خوشی (khushī): the kh is a velar fricative, as in Scottish "loch." The ī is long. Three syllables: khu-SHEE.
فریاد (faryād): four syllables — far-YA-ad. Common in poetry; the stress falls on the second syllable.
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